I bet you didn’t even have to watch the video to figure out where this happened. You started reading the title and before I could get all the way through ‘soc–’ you were like “Florida!”
Thus why you are the bomb. And my favorite reader. (It’s been awhile since I did any shameless pandering so enjoy it, maggots)
So a very secretive man with low self-esteem or under the influence of bath salts ordered a 20 piece chicken McNugget meal. I know he recorded some ‘dead rat soccer’ match’ (where he gave up at least one goal) but let’s focus here people. What sort of debauched savage orders a 20 piece for himself? And the way he says it:
“As I place an order for 20 piece, I see the four employees corner the rat, one of the employees step on it, kill it and they start kicking it across the floor like it’s a soccer ball,
Makes me sick to my stomach! Who says things like that all nonchalantly? “Ayo, homedog, gimme a 20 piece.” Tell me this man’s not on bath salts. Even the guy who was on bath salts (but wasn’t actually on bath salts) wouldn’t eat a 20 piece. That’s why he was eating that guy’s face. C’mon folks, it’s painfully obvious. 20 piece or hobo’s face? It’s no contest.
Anyway, while this guy is probably filling his pockets with dipping sauces, the McDonalds crew keeps their eye on the prize:
“At that point, everyone gets a little angry that I’m doing that. They swept the rat underneath my feet, and then they took the broom and started shouting at me, ‘stop filming’ and put the broom in my face,” the man said.
He didn’t sweep it under your feet. He scored. You said so yourself. They were playing soccer and your tubby diabetes filled secret agent ass can’t make a save. Get your head in the game!
So what does the man who shall be named later do? He’s going to sue. Guy gets scored on and somebody touches him with a broom that may or may not have touched some vermin and now we gotta bring in the lawyers. Oh my god, I saw a rat in a McDonalds! My rights have been violated! My right to not have a spontaneous dead rat soccer match start up when I’m trying to inhale 20 mechanically separated chicken flavored food pucks. It’s the 28th amendment. Right after the right not to be offended.
Sorry, Mister-I’m-super-privacy-guy-but-going-to-contact-a-news-station-because-I’m-not-that-private-and-I-know-a-opportunity-when-I-see-one-and-this-is-a-grand-opportunity-to-acquire-many-McNuggets-so-I’m-going-to-run-with-it-guy: Dead rat soccer matches happen. Maybe if you weren’t so busy eating disgusting amounts of McNuggets you’d know that.
People nowadays. Gah! And hit the gym once in a while, would ya? Rotund motherfucker.
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I love Mcnuggets. I could easily close down a 20 piece. I could hold my twenty piece in one hand, my dipping sauce in another and prevent the rat from scoring. What I am most disgusted with is his inability to make the save. I hope his lawsuit gets thrown out of court though. Not because of lack of merit, but because I am genuinely concerned that this may cause a rise in the price of 20 pieces everywhere. I mean, Mackendon’s Supper Club has to make up that money somewhere, right? Bold flavors have got to be affordable guys.
Kudos on the use of Mack N’Don’s Supper Club. That make you, me, and my father as the only people in history to call it that. I could only take down a 6 piece because I am the one who’s actually only in it for the dipping sauces. The nuggs are just a vessel. And you’re right, it does send a bad message if this lawsuit goes through. He should have been able to make that save. I don’t even play dead rat soccer and I could made that save. I mean, c’mon! There was nothing on that rat!
Oh honestly. Every fast food restaurant in America has a pest problem at one time or another. I totally get why the employees didn’t want him filming. It’s not because they were doing anything wrong, but people generally tend to make a big deal out of nothing, which is exactly what this guy did. I guaran-damn-tee you there were worse things on that broom than anything from the rat. It’s a fast food restaurant – that broom was probably as old as the hills and teeming with ebola or some crazy shit like that. It didn’t even touch your skin, man, stopping whining like a little girl.
This guy didn’t even find anything IN his food. Let me know when that happens, then maybe I won’t mind you jacking up the justice system with this tomfoolery.
Indeed. If you are not touched on your skin by the rat broom, you must acquit.
He doesn’t really have a case…except for maybe the diabetes mentioned. What I find nasty is killing the rat and then playing with it. Where is an exterminator when you need one? Gross.
Well if the exterminator shows up, then the game’s over and nobody wants that.
Not only could I down a 20-piece like it was a 8 hotdogs, but I could do it after eating a 10-pack of tacos from Taco Bell (made with real meat).
Yes, you could. Cuz fat.