That’s right, it’s time for some cheap filler content! Whoo-hooo! Filler content! Congratulations to me! Filler, filler, filler, filler, filler, anniversary, anniversary, anniversary Whoo-YOLO!:
And done. Easiest blog post EVAR! Wait, you want more? Fine.
My first post on this blog was an Origin Story that I kind of cringe at reading now. It was clear I had no idea what I was doing. You could make the argument that I still don’t. I could make the argument that you should stop being a dick. You could make the argument that that doesn’t prove I don’t not know what I’m doing. I could become confused and then righteously indignant. And then I could go blog about it so we’ll see who has the last laugh!
Fuck you cat!
Anyway I will take some time to thank a whole bunch of people who have put up with my blog and my bitter complaining about other crappy blogs that get way more viewers. You are salt of the earth. You really are….now that I’ve got your ear, can you believe this bitch at MckMama makes 150k a year? Do you believe that? Explain that to me. DO IT.
Anywho, some Thank You’s are in order:
- Thank you to anyone who’s ever read this blog. I understand if it was a one-time mistake. We all make mistakes. I feel bad about that farmhouse I burned down…that I watched somebody else burn down….that I heard about was burned down.
- Thank you to my super fans/commenters: El Guapo, A-Bomb, SGD, Lance Throttle, Jason, David, Beth (who re-tweets a lot and finagled a follow out of Yoko).
- Actually anybody whose ever left a comment. They are all appreciated. Unless you say mean stuff. Then my friends appreciate it because they like nothing better than to see strangers on the internet eat my lunch. And also everybody who reads and doesn’t comment. Basically anybody whose ever come here. Especially if you told somebody else about it.
- A big thank you to Cassie who thinks I never mention her when she’s supposed to be mentioned and who always StumbleUpons (?) my posts after I
threatenremind her four or five times to do it. - Another big thank you to SA’s Corporate Vice President Of Global Brand Design, Mr. Jacob Weber who is responsible for the Header Logo (and it’s variations) as well as the Operation Yoko No No logo. When he’s not spending far more time on logos for me than he ever should, he also flies helicopters here.
- And last and also least, the man who has managed to set the bar high for climbing down the corporate ladder here at Something Authorly: Mr. Will Weber. Let’s take chronological look at all the titles that Mr. Will Weber has held:
- Director Of North American SEO Operations (July 2011)
- VP of Global North American SEO Operations, Mergers, Acquisitions, And Other High Level Stuff (August 2011)
- Intern (Jan. 2012)
- World’s Worst Intern (Mar. 2012)
In spite of all this, Will did migrate my blog from Blogger to WordPress and has fixed untold problems that I have caused all the while telling me what an idiot I am. He has also threatened to erase my blog or alternately to allow Chinese hackers into my code so that they can smear poop everywhere. He was a Chinese studies major so I think he knows what he’s talking about when it comes to poop smearing. That being said, Will I made this meme just for you:
Only 45,000 more views till that first paycheck buddy.
/
At what point do you stop talking about your child in weeks/months and start talking about him in years? My child is 43 months old. At least you slipped in the 1yr thing as well. Otherwise, I would have taunted you much more than I already do.
Never! My odometer just rolled over 400 months in March. I would like to know what it’s like to hit four digits though. Did you have a party in 1997 when you turned a thousand months?
I wish I remembered. It was so long ago.
As an owner of an ‘ad revenue generating’ website, i can say keep up the good work and the money will follow. Or, start a real company… But trust me, that’s not as fun.
Hey, as soon as Q5 hits, a certain “real” company will become a ‘real’ company. That’s one quotation mark closer to a real company.
Happy Aquatennial! Keep up the good work and someday, when you’re least expecting it, BAM. Anal fissures. What are ya gonna do, amiright?
I was hoping for something like BAM! All the monies! But anal fissures it is. Just as well. I don’t even know what I would do with all the monies. It would be like a dog getting a hold of a weedwacker. Sure, you’re impressed but it will end badly.
Well, the intern just swapped your broken ass adsense code for his own account. Eat it puss-face. I’m taking ALL the money.
I just hope the fucking thing works. I’m tired of looking at that blank space over there. Mocking me and my non-Google-PIN having ass.
See Himbo? You thank your intern and he gets a false sense of self-worth. Rookie mistake but easily remedied. Time to demote him to cub reporter and send his ass to Damascus. Happy Yearthday!
Is cub reporter less than intern? What’s below intern? A random stranger? This is actually a hedge against The Intern deleting my entire website. Now that he’s making $1.19 per month, he’ll think twice about threatening me. A little “skin in the game” as the businesstocracy like to say about the peasants.