Matt Fors wants to fight all women according to a stupid Youtube video featuring Matt Fors.
There were over 1.3 billion videos on Youtube as of March 2012. No doubt that count is well over 1.5 billion today. Over 60 hours of video is uploaded each minute of every day. So while you watched 47 for Ted lead singer and pro-dude dude Matt Fors issue his challenge, 2700 minutes of footage was uploaded.
All of it was less stupid than this video. And yet here we are.
According to Wikipedia, intergender wrestling “was first popularized in the late-1970s/early-1980s by controversial song-and-dance man Andy Kaufman.” I can’t begin to express how much I love that description of Andy Kaufman. In the 90′s and early 2000′s, professional wrestling incorporated intergender wrestling cuz “Attitude Era“. (Chyna attituded her way to 2 Intercontinental titles).
It seems that Matt Fors has watched either or both recently. Then Matt Fors drank and removed his shirt for reasons unknown, though possibly because he just finished wrestling. His metal-as-fuck hair appears sweaty from unknown pre-video exertion.
Matt Fors then issues a bold challenge to all women:
I will fight any woman, any place, anywhere, any size, any race, any age
It is unclear the difference between any place and anywhere though he could be referring to venues versus geographical location. Or maybe this is a reference to WWE. “I’ll fight you in a junkyard in Detroit! I’ll fight you in a swamp in Miami! I’ll fight you in a meth lab in Albuquerque!”
Matt Fors gives an example of the sort of woman to whom he will deliver a tune-up:
Ah, 6’1”, you know, body-building chicks, i will take you down.
This is one of his bolder statements as he appears to be about 5’8 to 5’10 and no more than 160 pounds. He’d be punching above his weight against a 6’1” body-building chick and I am salivating at the thought of it.
Matt Fors then tells the camera that his any-any-any deal includes any fighting style including something called “shoe fighting” before his heretofore unheard Boston accent kicks in:
Any a that gay fucking mah-tial aughts shit. I will fight you anywhere and I’m only…this big or whatever.
Oh, c’mon Matt Fors tell us how big you are. Every single viewer at this point is thinking to themselves: How big is this guy? Do I know any chicks bigger than him who live in the Stoughton, MA area? Do they know any gay fucking mah-tial aughts shit?
Then Matt Fors shows his support for the gay community:
All men are superior to all women physically. And unless you’re super, super gay…and weak but even super weak gay guys would destroy pretty much any woman
You hear that super weak gay guys? You too can unleash your inner Chris Brown on basically most bitches. So there’s a feather in your cap.
So the question is: Why Himbo, have you forced me to watch this dipshit?
Don’t you desperately want to see Matt Fors fight a chick and get his ass beat? Isn’t it partly because of his hair?
What that’s not enough for you? What if I told you he had an awful, awful band? Guess what genre. Too late. Speed Metal. (selected song title: I Jerk Off To Black Hookers)
So SA is going to do its part in helping this video go viral. It currently has 1483 views. That is a crying shame. Let’s help some woman beat Matt Fors’ ass. If for no other reason than to stop him from uploading anymore videos to Youtube. Videos like this one:
Have an intergender weekend.
OPERATION: YOKO NO NO UPDATE- WEEK 17
Yoko is following: 866,491 (+17,247)
@SomethingAuthor is following: 1595 (+5)
Weekly Recap: I want you to look at something. This is a tweet from Yoko this week:
This is an actual movie with a real IMDB entry. It currently has 4.3 stars (out of 10 but I’m think maybe people thought it was Rotten Tomatoes and were rating it out of 100). She earned paper money from this. Is there a world where this is not total fucking bullshit?
Something Authorly Follower Of The Week: Danny Charnley @dankcharnley
Here is his bio on Twitter: “Pro Bridge-Burner/Life-Coach Coach/CYBERBULLY/Chubby Chaser/Avid Reader of Smut/SQUIRTER/Damaged Goods/Neck-Bearded Dungeon Master/STUNTCOCK/Rib Sauce Judge”. The question isn’t can I afford to follow him. The question is can you afford to NOT follow him? Makes you think when I put it that way, huh?